Addiction

I try to pull myself away .. Keep away from yu .. kill this yearning in my body .. I do it because i know .. I KNOW that if i dont i'll relapse .. Im addicted .. Every hug every kiss every soft spoken word .. Your touch that causes me to forget the world around me .. It gives my such a high that i dont wanna shake it for fear of losing the moment .. Nothing but bliss when im high on you .. But that crash? My God, that crash when reality comes barreling down and dirty laundry begins to stink makes me wish i never took that first hit .. The one that brought me to where i am now .. The one that gives me such horrible withdrawal when i try to stop .. Crying shaking begging for peace .. This addiction just keeps growing .. It whispers ever so sweetly in my ear "its okay, one more hit wont kill you" .. I pull away .. i try to fight it but the feeling you give me far outweighs everything else .. for now im defeated .. slowly i give in .. i mean, its only one little hit right? right. So i just take one hit .. But that one little hit turns into two nd two turn a full blown session .. before long here i am again .. strung out on you .. in a daze not in my right mind not thinking like me .. doing whatever this addiction wants ..  back where i started .. all that rehab for this? Hmph .. such a pity .. Can you see what you do to me? Just look at me .. still stuck .. More strung out .. And even deeper into my addiction to you ...

Bottom of the Bottle

At first the drinks were for recreation .. Shot here, cup there .. All in good fun .. Now theyre used to take away the pain but a couple drinks never seem to get the job done anymore .. So she puts the bottle to her head .. Quarter gone .. Try to relax .. think about why youre unhappy .. Think about who makes yu feel that way .. Pick it back up .. Half gone .. Now she's wondering where she's gone wrong .. What did she do to these people? Why did they claim to care so much but show it so little? .. Three quarters done .. She's drifting away .. She wonders if it would just be better for everyone if she just gave up .. Whats the point of fighting if you'll never win? Whats the point of trying over and over again? .. To her head again .. Its almost done .. She just wants all the problems to go away .. She just wants some kind of peace .. As she takes her final sips she feels herself fading .. She'll finally give everyone what they seem to want .. To not have to deal w such a burden anymore .. 19 .. 23 .. She'll just leave all her problems at the bottom of the bottle .. Because everything would be easier that way right? Give the people what the want .....

Broken Pieces

She's still laying there .. Shattered .. Torn .. Laying in a pile of a million broken pieces .. She debates if she even has it in her to fix them again .. Thats all she ever seems to be doing; putting back together her broken pieces because others dont understand the concept of "handle with care" .. No matter how much she expresses her fragile state, its just discarded with just about everything else she says .. She just doesnt understand .. While she lays there broken, everyone passes her by .. They see the mess but no one seems to care enough to help clean it up .. Even those who claim they'd there for these times especially are gone .. Even with them being the one who caused it you'd think they'd stay to help straighten things out .. But no .. Thats not how it is for her .. No matter how the mess is caused it always ends up her job to clean it up because somehow its still always going to be her fault .. There was one she could count on to be there but even they didnt want the job .. So now she has a choice .. She can either fix it herself and wait to be broken again, or she can stay broken and wait for the mess to be swept away, discarded and forgotten again .. And it sadly seems she's anticipating the latter ....