That Was Then 12.29.11

i remember back in tha day, not 2 long ago wen people meant what they said nd wouldnt go back on there word just becuz dey were afraid of wat ppl wld thnk of dem..i remember wen somebody said dey love u it was because dey really did..i remember wen dudes didnt just tlk 2 grls cuz dey wanted 2 fck..i remember wen thinking for yourself was acceptable..I remember wen ppl were actually faithful..i remember wen girls who were pretty were smart too nd not ashamd of it it..i remembr wen a dude would only call a female out dere name wen dey actually portrayed the actions of the name they were being called..i remember wen words had actual meanin.. bt nowadays, ppl will say and do anythng to get wat they want..ppl cant keep it real wit others and sometimes not even dere selves..ppl claim dey love u bt dont evn knw wat d word means or how 2 really show it..dudes will fuck anything wit 2 legs a pussy nd a heartbeat..ppl dnt think or do for demselves for fear of bein rejectd by society..dudes AND females are less and less faithful becuz apparently its hard 2 actually wanna TRy do do bettr so dey go d easy way out not carin who gets hurt in d process..pretty girls selln demselves short because society got em thinkn dat u cant b smart AND beautiful at d same time or u'll nevr get d man u want..[d way i c it..if a dude cant accept u fa being u, FUCK DAT NIGHA.he nt not worth none of your time nor effort]a dude will call a girl a bitch hoe slut trick nd any other word dey can think of just so dey feel "powerful"..[nigha dat aint power. u juszt a coward ass nigha hidin insecurities behind words.please find d nearest oil spill,set it on fire nd jump in.] ppl cll everybody bae nd baby nd most times its cuz dey wnt somethin not because d person dey calln dat is somebody dey care bout or even got feelins for[den dat distorts d line between wen somebody really dere 4 u or for ur aquirments causing confusion nd so much unneccesary drama].. people need 2 grow da hell up. it is may 18th 2010 10:42 pm..how much longer are we gonna put on dis façade dat everything is ok nd everybody bein real? personally um tired of dat shit.ppl wanna claim bein "grown" bt dont wanna accept d maturity nd responsibility dat comes wit it..smdh...i wonder how long itll take to get rite..will it take a couple days? months? a few years? or mayb yall wanna wait til judgement cuz i knw yall will deff act rite den..or will u????


HOTGiRL

Key To My Heart

thought id never let anybody come this close to me again after the last one..deadbolt on my heart..startd playin the same games dat the others playd and aftr a whle i threw the key away..then u came around.. didnt even know that u had found that key.. dont know wat is was about u but from jump u were just,,, DIFFRENT..still i was cautious..i watchd how u work n how u act nd liked wat i saw but still was wary because everything always seems good in the beginning then changes 2 wats really real..then i got 2 know u a little better..got more comfortable with u..evn got 2 the point whre u were good enough 2 meet my family which never happens..they good at readn people and they seemd 2 like u off rip so i seen somethng there..i realized that i was startn 2 like u a lil more and startd givin myself every reason why that was a bad.."remember wat happnd the last time..dont set uself up 4 dat pain again.."nd my fave, "he's from lauderdale dats a no no"...then i startd 2 realize that none of wat happnd previously had anythng 2 do wit u..so i decided 2 give u a chance..kinda glad i did 2 because bein around u made me forget how things were in the past..u took the key nd unlocked my heart nd now im as nervous as ever because that the scariest thing i could ever think 2 happn but uma b a big girl about it because u never know wat will happen unless u take a chances..so um gonna take this risk and let u hold on 2 the key to my heart for now..just dont give me a reason 2 change the locks on you... -Ash

This Ones For Yu

Feelin like u alone in a room full of people?I kno the feelin..Family turn dey back on u?Quicker than u'd think..Friends turned 2 foes?All 2 often..Feel like u fightn life just 2 make it 2 2maro?Been there done that..But if u got dat one person thats gon keep it real vvit u even vvhen u'd rather hear a lie evrythng gon be str8, in da end you gon b in a better postion than evrybdy else.2 have one REAL friend is better den a buncha fake ones.and alvvays kno u got a friend in god--he gon be realer thatn anything on this earth..this is 4 everybody thats been hurt by a promise 2 keep it 100 dat couldnt b fulfilled.ppl svvear they'd never hurt u but did u vvorse than everyone else.took ur kindness for vveakness.the ones that u gave ur heart 2 and dey did nthn but play vvit it til it broke.ppl u cared about that aint care bout u.i kno i aint perfect but i REFUSE to be like evrybdy else.So Green dis is 4 u.evrybdy vvho goin thru it dis for u..keep ya head up dont let nbdy get u dvvn.u deserve nthn but the best..-Ash

Tears For A Stranqer 4.28.2007

Some say u cant cry for someone udon't  know but it's a different story when that person is one that should have been there all along..the last time i saw u alive i was 6, that was almost 13 years ago. The last time i talked to u was 6years  ago. The last time I saw u 2 years ago was the saddest..U were in a casket nd I  almost fell out when i saw u..people asked me how i can cry for somebody who i barely knew; the reason being just that: i barely knew you and now ill never get the chance to. i cry not only because i didnt get the chance to really get to know yu but because i never will nd thats  the hardest part u never got to see me finish school nd u wont be the one walkng me down the aisle.. when i have kids the wont have a grandfather nd i wont ever get to be able to sit down nd have a father daughter convo wit u so i cry.. There is nothing me or anybody elsecan  do to bring u back.. i miss u daddy i cry tears for a stranger 2 my mind but not 2 my heart..U might b gone bt u are not forgotten..I love u Tony.. R.i.P Daddy 11.11.66 - 4.28.07

New Beqinninqs

when day turns to night and its all said and done

i know my choice was right and i know you're the one

i cant see the future and i cant change the past

but the presents what i live for no more worrying about the last

im focused on now because that's all i can control

im not a psychic a fortune teller or an oracle

but will i make sure im happy??that question is rhetorical

you keep me happy and show me your emotions are true

ill keep it 100 000 and always be faithful to you

you make me feel like im ready to try this love thing again

because the feelings i have for you makes you more than just a friend.....

The Difference Between

The difference between yu and me is yu have no emotions and i wear my heart on my sleeve. the difference between me and yu is i really loved and cared about yu
the difference between yu and i is i was always there for u and id never leave your side
the difference between i and yu is yu know that i would never leave yu and my feelings were true
Id do anything for u no questions asked i never once blamed u for something in the past
i loved u really loved u with all of my heart and just broke it and I'm falling apart
i cry myself 2 sleep wen i lay down in my bed with a million and one WHY questions goin thru my head
im still tryna figure out whre we went wrng nd how i could let somebody manipulate my heart nd mind for so long
i still find myself thinking about yu almost all the time nd even though i still love u i want u off my mind
i shwd u my real feelings now my emotions are gone cuz the difference between us is u moved on...

If I Was That Kinda Girl

if i was THAT kinda qirl,, after we disaqree,
id fill ur wall with all the texts yu send so ur girl could see..
if i was THAT kinda qirl,, after we fiqht,
id tell her how yu wouldnt let me qo,, holdin me all niqht..
if i was THAT kinda qirl,, id run and tell ya misses,
bout how the whole niqht yu filled my lips wit kisses..
yu lie bout her then to her yu lie bout me,
and yu think that we both too blind to see..
but smart qirls peep qame and because of ur rush,
yu started slippin and exposed too much..
tell us both half truths thinkin it'd just qet let qo,
but lyin bout a bitch? smh dats a no no..
dont claim yu comin real if yu just doin thee opposite,
because yu will suffer and be pissed off because of it..
if yu just tell thee truth then nobody can have yu stuck,
but when yu qet cauqht in a lie?? lol yu qon be f**********ck'd..
but im not that kinda qirl so i wont do yu dat way,
cuz thats just childish--somethin like the qames yu play..
we grown rite?? so baby lets act like we are,
cuz bein that way aint qon qet yu too far..
i could sit and name names but thats not how it qoes in my world,
and all i can tell yu is-- YOUR LUCKY IM NOT THAT GIRL.

:)

Single Friends

Single friends. when you're single they can be one of your biggest assets. always there when yu wanna clear your mind, party, etc. but when you're in a relationship? 3/5 times they become your biggest liability. sure not everybody yu choose to hang out with is gonna be in a relationship and thats fine. the problem lies within taking their advice about your relationship. think about it. if they were SOOOOO qood at being in a relationship and their advice was SOOO qood,  WHy ARE THEy SiNGLE?? i'll give yu a moment. done? lets move on. single friends are the biggest relationship haters out. why? because they're not in one. its the whole "misery loves company" thing. 9/10 times the single friend is usually bitter af and jealous because yu have somethinq they want but cant aquire. every little pitfall in your relationship whether serious or minor is ammunition to their little bitter rants. have yu ever had a issue with your significant other and hit up a friend for advice and the first thing they say is "idk why you fuckin with them they so this they so that i wouldn't stay with them if i was you." now wat does that do to you? it builds up the doubt yu have already a little bit more. now here is what yu can do. A) tell them "you're not me so ima do what i think is right keep your bitter thoughts to yourself or yu gon keep bein sinqle and lonely." [sometimes you gotta be blunt with em. ya the truth hurts but somebody's qotta tell em *single shoulder shrug*] or B)"damn i think You right..this is a lotta work bein with somebody =(" #superpause when the FUCK did being in a relationship become something that should be easy??? if it was so easy guess who would be in one just like yu?? *shadily glances toward single friend* a relationship is something you're supposed to WORK for so that even if things qet hard yu know yu can qet through it. make sense yet? if you keep listenin to single people guesd what you'll be?? SiNGLE. and more than likely miserable just like them. a relationship is between TWO people. not two people and everybody who wants to be involved. i mean.. it's fine to have people yu know you can go to to get GOOD and i mean "man i know you care about them you're just going through rough times but no matter what it is , if yall care about each other yall can work it out just don't give up on em" good advice. just dont keep the people who only have the negative things about you and yours around you because they WiLL fill your head with bs thats just gonna have you more in doubt and ultimately ruin everything you've work so hard for. the only person yu should be listening to is yOURSELF because at the end of the day you and ONLy you knows what yu will ultimately do. so please. dont set yourself up for the kill by listening to bitter bitches/nighas. just think about this every time yu have the urge to listen to them- "when is the last time i saw them in a happy healthy relationship with its ups and downs but still worked throuqh it instead of just giving up?" if somethinq doesn't come up riqht away then they're proooooooooobably not the ones yu should be listening to #ijs

-Ash

@beautifltrouble